Are you a fan of Monty Python? Douglas Adams? Red Dwarf? Terry Pratchett? Spinal Tap? Then we have a treat for you!!
Sacred Wind is the brainchild of Andy Coffey, a splendid chap based in the lovely town of Frodsham. He has conceived a whole world centred around a Nordic Flatulence Rock Band called Sacred Wind… and has released a trilogy of books and even an album by Sacred Wind, more info of which is here...
Authoramp are about books, so we’ve added some more info below about Sacred Wind and the books available… enjoy!
From a land beyond distance and beyond time… in 1987… in Llangollen…
‘Sometimes there are tales that must be told, songs that must be sung, and farts that must be farted. And sometimes the spirit of these great adventures, heroic deeds, songs of glory, and flatulent blessings is powerful enough to touch the hearts, ears and nostrils of the gods. And so it is with Sacred Wind.’
King Beef Vindaloo-Boiled Rice III
Imagine Black Adder, Shrek, Douglas Adams, Monty Python, Terry Pratchett, David Eddings and Spinal Tap meeting for a few pints of fine ale and a good game of charades…(click the image to the right for your free PDF of Sacred Wind: Book 1)
On sale worldwide, at all good download stores!
Welcome to the world of Sacred Wind, a tale set in an alternative reality, featuring conscious curries, headbanging sheep, telepathic cats, magic cheese, an evil Baron, some very sexy faeries, and a Welsh Viking Flatulence Rock band….
‘Certainly, I know that I, King Beef Vindaloo-Boiled Rice III, puff my rice with pride and thicken my sauce when I recount the adventures of the Companionship of Wind. How a stranger from beyond distance and beyond time (a lad called Aiden Peersey, from your reality) joined Sacred Wind in their quest to win the Cestrian Music Tournament, to save the faerie queen, to win freedom for our land, to be able to fart freely, and to win the right to their cheese. It is the stuff of legend. And sometimes the gods decree that such legends need to be manifest in the entire Multiverse… although not necessarily the smells.’
‘And so, in order for these tales to be read and for these songs to be heard, it was decreed that we should seek one in your reality who would be a suitable channel. The criteria were very strict: a spiritually-attuned individual with fire in his veins, passion in his heart, sharpness of mind, and steel in his underpants. Unfortunately, we couldn’t find anyone who qualified, so we had to settle for Andy Coffey. And so it is he who has been the vehicle for our story and for the magnificent songs of Sacred Wind themselves. His wind will be forever blessed.’
So, read and listen with pride, my friends. May your rice be forever fluffy, may your poppadoms be crisp, and may Odin bless your wind.’
King Beef Vindaloo-Boiled Rice III
Transported to an alternative reality by the Navigation App on his quantum computer-powered Smart Phone, Aiden discovers a land ruled by the evil Baron Blacktie, who has banned rock music, outlawed unauthorised flatulence, and made cheese sniffing a crime. And so, he soon becomes immersed in a world where sheep manage pubs and play in orchestras, cats are telepathic, cheese comes from mines, and where Wrexham is a ‘Currydom’ ruled by King Beef Vindaloo-Boiled Rice III and his wife, Queen Chicken Tikka Masala-Coconut Rice. As if all that wasn’t enough to contend with, he soon joins Sacred Wind and The Companions of Wind on their perilous journey to win the Cestrian Music Tournament… and confront Baron Blacktie…It’s safe to say that the last thing Aiden Peersey expected when he began his trip to Llangollen was to move between realities and meet a bunch of Welsh Vikings who played in a rock band called Sacred Wind. It’s also safe to say that the technology geek and part-time sound engineer didn’t expect to be catapulted into a quest to win a music tournament, to save the faerie queen, to win freedom for their land, to be able to fart freely, and to win the right to their cheese. Nevertheless, that’s exactly what happened…
So, if you want to delve into a book where curries will make you laugh, where sheep will make you cry, where no-one sniggers when your first name is ‘Oldfart’, where you’ll cheer quite a lot at the bits that have obviously been written to incite cheering, where you’ll think about faeries in ways you really shouldn’t, where you’ll be even more scared of Traffic Wardens than you ever thought possible, where vacuum cleaners get possessed, where Welsh Vikings can have platonic relationships with English sheep, where you finish reading the story with a smile on your face and warmth in your heart, and want to read more as soon as you’ve finished, then Sacred Wind is the book for you.
Contact Sacred Wind:
Tel: 07870 627692 – Manager – Oldfart Olafson
Artwork by Joe Latham http://www.lookhappydesign.com/
May your curry be spicy, may your poppadom bowl be full, and may Odin bless your wind!